Inside the Helmet: Brandon Weeden’s NFL Nightmare

Weeden has nowhere to go but up (Mark Duncan/Associated Press)

Brandon Weeden is the most powerful man in Cleveland.  Few quarterbacks can spur an entire town to openly weep in a three hour span.  Weeden triggered the event with an apocalyptic week one performance that made Tim Couch cringe: 12 completions in 35 attempts, 118 yards, 4 interceptions, 2 fumbles and a 5.1 quarterback rating.  It was the worst opening start for an NFL rookie since 1960.

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Let’s Celebrate Kyle Boller, and Nine Years of NFL Letdowns

Boller is finished (Nick Laham/Getty Images)

The most disappointing moment in my life occurred November 9, 2011.  I had spent three days pouring my soul into an intimate love letter, only to discover that a 20 year old reincarnation of Aphrodite was in fact a lesbian.  I have also admired photogenic quarterback Kyle Boller from afar, and while I’ve learned a lesson about judging a book by its cover, the sum of his NFL career has been similarly dismaying.   The Southern California native retired on July 29, a day after signing with the San Diego Chargers, closing the chapter on an underwhelming tale of three-and-outs and untimely injuries.   I once believed in Boller, but like many attractive individuals, he was merely a tease.

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